Love in the time of Corona

Hello Meltingpot Community,

What did you do this weekend? Me? I officiated my little brother’s wedding. Via Zoom. He was in Baltimore, I was in Philadelphia. But despite the physical distance between us, and the coldness of a computer screen, we still managed to have a meaningful, multicultural celebration of love. It was my first wedding in the time of Corona.

Broken Dreams

My brother met his wife ( So fun to say wife now!) almost five years ago. Like many couples today, they met online even though they lived in the same city. She was finishing medical school though and would soon move to Baltimore to begin her residency. Needless to say, their relationship required time, patience and flexibility to develop and flourish, but it did. And when the two of them decided to marry, it was a surprise to no one, but all parties involved – her family and ours – were really happy. The wedding plans proceeded; Save-the-date cards were sent; The perfect location for the ceremony and reception was chosen; Vietnam was selected for the honeymoon destination; Vacation time was secured. And then, like an invisible monster, the Covid-19 crisis slowly but surely, destroyed every single plan.

Finding Inspiration from War Brides

I remember talking to my brother as he and his wife were trying to figure out how to salvage any part of their wedding plans. At that point, there was still a fleeting hope that we might be able to have a small gathering, perhaps in someone’s backyard, with just family and close friends. At the time, that felt like a real possibility, but it also felt like a shadow of what had been originally planned. My brother sounded defeated but resigned. But he said something that struck me as wise. He said he and his wife were thinking about the couples who married during war times. They didn’t get to have fancy parties, pretty cakes or any sense of security that life would even continue. And they certainly didn’t have the Internet. All they really had was love. And that was enough.

Bridging Traditions and Cultures

I am so proud of my brother and sister-in-law because while, of course they mourned the loss of their grand celebration and international honeymoon, they held fast to what was important to them in their wedding ceremony. The party, the fancy dress, even the honeymoon wasn’t important. What was important was that they love each other and that they are both joyfully entering into this relationship and opportunity to build a new family that brings together two distinct cultures, ethnicities and traditions. So, while my brother and sister-in-law got married in a forrest surrounded by nature instead of friends and family in the flesh (Immediate family was watching via Zoom though), they made sure to keep the cultural traditions that matter in the ceremony. It was wonderful to see them jump the broom and step on the glass in a beautiful, lush, green forest, blessed by Mother Nature.

Weddings in the Time of Corona

My brother isn’t the only one who has watched his wedding plans disintegrate because of the Corona Crisis. I know there are thousands, perhaps millions of people in this same situation. And I feel their pain. However, I would urge anyone trying to decide if they should postpone their wedding because of the crisis, or carry on somehow, to chose love. In addition to the fact that there are many ways to host a wedding, even with our social distancing measures in place, it is critically important to remember what a wedding is supposed to be about. It’s not about the party, it’s about the promise one is making to another human soul. And as I told my brother and new bonus sister, if they can pull off a wedding in the time of Corona, then they can probably handle any challenges and/or obstacles that come their way. It’s good practice 🙂

Long Live Love!

I’m wondering if any of you, dear readers, have weddings coming up? What are your plans? Share in the comments below.  Also, The New York Times wants to hear from anyone who has had a wedding in the time of Corona. You know, I’m listening!

Be Well!

Peace!

(Photo by wendel moretti from Pexels)